Science Fiction Stuff I Am SO Ready For

Cover Art - Blue GalaxyIt’s been an amazing run, over the last hundred years or so, of inventions and technological  advancements. Even so, there are a few things I am impatiently awaiting.

1.  The Teleporter: It’s amazingly difficult to get my kids off to school on the bus every morning. One refuses to wear winter gear even in the middle of a sub-zero cold snap; the other is genetically incapable of leaving the house until the school bus is at the bottom of the drive and waiting. Where’s the teleporter, I ask you? No need to dress for the weather and one can procrastinate until  the very last second. I need someone to invent this, like, before school goes back on Tuesday morning.

2.  The Vulcan Mind Meld: There are things I will never understand about my husband by using mere communication methods. Why is he unable to notice wet towels on beds? Why must all cupboard doors be open at all times? What is it he finds so amusing about Seinfeld re-runs? With a Vulcan Mind Meld I could find out all these things. I will finally understand the strange workings of my husband’s mind. Want. Now.

3.  The Space Elevator: I’ve been enjoying following Canadian astronaut, Chris Hadfield, on Twitter. Along with his charming, funny and fascinating tweets, he frequently links to pictures taken from the International Space Station. I have a hankering to go visit, explore the ISS, and get a load of that view with my own eyes. All without having to go through the schooling and training required to get into space. One space elevator, tout suite, merci. Just give me a book and hit the button for the penthouse.

4: The Babel Fish: I want one. I want one bad. Combine this with the teleporter and the world would be my oyster. Paris for breakfast. Moscow for lunch. Tokyo for dinner. And never once be in the embarrassing position of having to mime “I need the nearest bathroom NOW before I pee myself,” or worry that the grabby-handed guy on the subway is unable to understand my foul and insulting language regarding his appearance, his lineage and his breath.

5.  Food Replicator: Oh, be still my beating heart. To never have to go grocery shopping again! To be able to feed finicky eaters by merely saying “healthy, balanced meal that tastes and looks like chocolate-covered popcorn.” To have something to serve to that inevitable vegan dinner guest with multiple food allergies and demands.  To never again spend hours planning and preparing meals that my children look at suspiciously before asking what is for dessert. Please invent one, like, yesterday.

Is this too much to ask? Am I being unreasonable? I don’t need a phone that’s smarter than myself, a computer that reads my mind or a car that can parks itself. These five things above are what I want. What about you?

Author Pic* * *

Diane Dooley is the author of Blue Galaxy and Blue Nebula from Carina Press, Mako’s Bounty from Decadent Publishing, and That Night from Wild Rose Press.

She writes horror, science fiction and romance, short stories, novellas and novels. She also Facebooks, blogs and tweets.

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19 comments

  1. Hi Diane! I’d love all those things as well…but I think that maybe you’re going to have to wait a little longer (-: Btw, my husband is blind to wet towels on bed as well!!

    1. There must be some kind of genetic explanation for the towel thing. Must be!

  2. Gawd, I need a food replicator sooooo bad!

    1. I think the only thing I’d miss is the smell of good food cooking. When I make bread, for instance. Oh, it makes the house smell soooo good.

  3. This is an awesome list! Yes! Want!

    1. These are all permanently on my Christmas wish list.

  4. Hahaha! Great list Diane. As for the Vulcan Mind Meld and finding out what you husband is thinking, be very careful about that. Number one, the truth may horrify you and two, if you were to gain that knowledge… well let’s just say we men will make sure that never happens. 😉

    I want doors that open when I walk up to them… we have those? Well do they make the swooshing noise? I think not!

    1. Could I handle the darkest corners of my husbands mind? I’m gonna have to mull on that one, Dale!

      Regarding the swooshy doors, I have a suggestion. make the ‘swoosh’ noise yourself as it opens. Yeah, you’ll look goofy, but you’re okay with that, right? *grin*

  5. Love this list! I’d especially like the teleporter. As for the Vulcan Mind Meld, well, I’m not entirely sure I want to know what goes on in my husband’s mind.

    1. My husband was muttering in his sleep last night. I wished I could’ve mind melded him to find out what was going on in that noggin of his!

  6. Great list! I think transporter and food replicator top my list. I think I’d rather have Star Trek’s universal translator than a babelfish. Something about sticking that thing in my ear give me goosebumps.

    1. I want to be an official breeder of babel fish.

  7. Teleporter! I think they’ve made some advancements on that, actually. That would make travel so much easier, wouldn’t it? And then how would security work……….
    Oh no. I just gave myself an idea I have no time to write *runs to make notes*

    1. A security system could be built in to the transporter, no?

  8. Definitely love to have a teleporter to replace all those 5 hour car trips to Grandma’s. I’d rather have a cleaning robot than a food replicator, though. The word ‘replicated’ regarding food gives me the heebie-jeebies…

    1. A cleaning robot! How could I have left that one off my list?

  9. Great post! I agree with all of the above and something to clean the house and do the laundry as well. Then I’ll have the time to make a dent in my TBR pile which now spans two bookcases!

    1. That’s quite a TBR pile, Liz!

  10. […] Science Fiction Stuff I Am SO Ready For […]

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